Unfortunately, when we experience love, we also experience loss.  It is the inevitable circle of life.  Watching someone you love deal with a terminal illness and then watching that loved one lose their battle with that illness is incredibly difficult, there is no way to change that.  Finding the right way to say good-bye is part of that process. While you may not be able to imagine how you are possibly going to get through it, somehow you will.  Here are few tips that we hope will help you say good-bye to your loved one.

Do Not Procrastinate

There is no way to know exactly when the end will come, so do not procrastinate thinking you should wait until the very last minute.  You may miss the opportunity altogether and have to live with that regret. It is not a bad thing if they live for a few hours, days, or even weeks after you have said god-bye.  It simply gives you time to enjoy each other’s company without you endlessly worrying about how you are going to say good-bye.

Accept Your Loved one is Dying

Do not insist that your loved is going to get better if their passing is inevitable. Accepting the truth about what’s happening will allow you and your loved one to say and feel what they’re truly thinking and feeling.

Humor is Okay

It is okay to laugh.  Then, again, it’s okay to cry.  Emotions will naturally come through at a time like this.  Do not hide them from your loved one.  Let them see the real you, the you that they know and love. They will probably laugh and cry along with you.  Just be honest with your emotions.

Ask for Forgiveness

If you have any regrets regarding anything you have said to your loved one or any of your past actions, let your loved one know that you are sorry and ask for their forgiveness.  Although you may not receive the response you’re hoping for, you will not be plagued by regret having wished you had had the conversation.

Offer Forgiveness

If you ask for forgiveness, your loved one may ask for forgiveness in return for past harmful words or actions.  Simply tell them you forgive them.  This will give them a sense of peace.  It will also give you a sense of peace after they pass away.

Alternatively, your loved one may not be ready to ask for forgiveness.  Do not let this taint your final moments together. You can still offer your forgiveness, by letting go of any hurt feelings and say that you forgive them in your heart and mind.

Tell Your Loved One You Love Them

It is never too late and there is no wrong time to say I love you to a loved one. Say it frequently; reminding both your loved one and yourself of the love you shared over the years, a love that will continue after your loved one has passed away.

Say Thank You

Thank your loved one for all they have done for you and all that they have meant to you. If you can, be specific in how he or she made a difference in your life.  It tells your loved one that their life had meaning, that their life made a difference.

Touch Speaks Volumes

Most people find the feeling of someone else touching them very comforting.  Hold their hand, or simply lay your hand on his or her arm.  Just let them know that you are there with them, even when they are no longer able to speak to you.  That contact will continue to let your loved one know that he or she is not alone.

One Last Thought

Remember, that while the final good-bye is necessary for you, it is truly about your loved one.  You want to bring your loved one comfort, knowing that he or she is loved.  While the last good-bye is sad, it can be beautiful and healing.